Esoterica Erotica

I finished watching the HD DVD rip of Brokeback Mountain last night. Now that those terrible "I can't quit you" jokes and the general increase in homophobia has passed (and since I don't think I've ever seen a Heath Ledger movie other than the Dark Knight), I thought I'd check it out. Overall, I did think it was boring, but I also found it kind of sweet. Maybe I got a bit misty in a couple of scenes. Maybe I laughed like a bastard when Heath Ledger's wife sees him fervently making out with Jake Gyllenhaal. So it's a gay romance movie. So what? It's not bad, but was the film worthy of an Oscar nomination? I don't think so.

I did re-watch Nick & Nora's Infinite Playlist the other night. As bitter as I may have been lately (my writing exacerbated that far more than how I really felt), this movie was a welcome change. It's just a sweet little film that's about a night on the town where two kids fall for each other and listen to great music. But that's perfectly fine. We don't need threats and grand plots to be entertained. I don't think it's necessarily a movie you're going to want to watch over and over again and quote with your friends, but I think it deserves to be given a chance. It's not a crazy, exaggerated time like Sixteen Candles was. Instead, it very well feels like a night that you may experience yourself. Also, credit needs to go to Ari Graynor who portrayed the most realistic drunken mess of a girl that I've ever seen on film.

Now let's bring it home with another comedy about love: Zack and Miri Make a Porno! If I could just cut to the point? It's the only other Kevin Smith movie I like other than Clerks and Clerks II. Look, I like Kevin Smith a lot. In fact, you could say I like Kevin Smith "they guy" far better than Kevin Smith "the director." I think his SModcast with pal Scott Mosier is probably the greatest thing he's ever done. It's consistently hilarious and Kevin and friends have given me plenty of topics of conversation to bring up around other people. That I now have a handful of people doubting the validity of Hellen Keller should speak for itself.

But back to the point of Zack and Miri... "Clown mouth" is in my vocabulary now thanks to this movie. Now I know what a "Dutch rudder" is. Now I know that "I'm gonna fuck you with my pecker!" is too dirty. You see, this is the kind of stuff that makes a comedy enjoyable to me. That I can just utter part of a phrase and have someone cracking up is the sign of something good. You could argue that this is all Kevin Smith does. That may be so, but if I'm smiling and making other people laugh, then what about that is bad?

Is Zack and Miri a great film? No. Can you enjoy it more than just on a comedy level? Perhaps. I know of one girl who said she cried during the movie. But even if you don't get all sappy at the drop of a hat, I guarantee you'll find something to laugh about. Like "Glen and Gary Suck Ross' Meaty Cock and Drop Their Hairy Nuts in His Eager Mouth." It's sort of a re-imagining like the Wiz was to the Wizard of Oz...

Death comes softly... In a pair of platform shoes

When I die, I just might go to hell. In that case, I'm sure this song will be playing when I get there.

A monster is born...

Imagine, if you will, the worst cover of a song that you love that you could possibly think of. Something really inappropriate like John Lennon's "Imagine" as a techno song or something along those lines. Now multiply that by ten and you'd have a rough idea of what I'm about to link you to. Enter Microsoft's Songsmith! Warning: If you don't want songs that you love ruined, don't click this link.

Compendium

A new Final Fantasy XIII trailer was unveiled today. And by new, I do mean new -- as in "not just recycling the same clip that we've seen ten times before." I think it's pretty impressive.

It even shows actual gameplay! I don't know how to describe it since I can't manipulate it myself, but from how the new battle system looks, it seems to be a cross between the old Active Time Battle system and the Active Dimension Battle system used in Final Fantasy XII. But that's just speculation on my part. I'm sure this new system has a wholly different acronym to go with it.

So does this new trailer temper or fuel the fires of my interest? After the seemingly unchanging trailers prior to this and the dearth of information regarding anything to do with the game, there's nowhere to go but up! The game had better be super epic though. To me, Final Fantasy XII seemed like it was just getting started when it ended.


In other news, I thought I'd provide a directory of sorts for all the different podcasts/videocasts you can listen to now that are comprised of recent ex-EGM/1UP staff members.
A Life Well Wasted
Area 5's Co-op
Geekbox
Rebel FM

This, of course, doesn't include blogs and the like of different staff members who had left prior. That'd be a decidedly more impressive (and perhaps useful) list featuring John Davison, Dana Jongewaard, Jeff Green, Patrick Klepek, etc. Add to that all the Twitter accounts I could link to... Perhaps one day I'll put it together, but I'm sure there's lots of people I'd miss. Still, what I do have should provide you with hours of entertainment every week.

Why so curious, George?

Saw this on digg and laughed.

What am I to think?

I watched the movie Junebug last night. It's one of those movies that I find hard to classify as "like" or "dislike" such as Towelhead. On one hand, Towelhead was incredibly hard to watch at times. On the other, I don't regret watching it. Now Junebug isn't at all like Towelhead in terms of subject and tone, but I still have a general feeling of malaise about it. So my question is this: What exactly is the message of Junebug?

Here's what I took away from it: Girls are dumb and weak and are drawn to poor relationships. I know of a few real life examples. Just because some asshole sticks their dick in you and gives you a child doesn't mean you're obliged to stay with that person. And they'll stick up for the jerk too, even if it's obvious to everyone else that it's a terrible relationship. (Which brings about a side point: Staying together for the kids is bullshit.)

Amy Adams plays the very pregnant Ashley whose husband, Johnny, is a moody ass who can't be bothered to show the least bit of compassion towards anyone. It's as if he feels that the world does things to him just to make him miserable. He's "stuck" with Ashley, who, although is very kind and enthusiastic, is also pretty dumb. Maybe neither can really do "better," but I think a monastic life would be better than just being miserable. And bringing a kid into the situation hoping it will be a cure all? A grave mistake.

On the flip side are Madeleine and George. Madeleine is a comely and intelligent art dealer who elopes with George after a week of knowing him. While visiting George's family (Johnny is his brother), Madeleine becomes aware that there's a terrible amount of things neither knows about the other. George is mostly absent from the film and what we do see of him is either sleeping on the couch or having sex with Madeleine. So what are the two of them doing together anyway? Neither of them could say, I'm sure. The conclusion that George's parents come to is that all they know about each other is that they love each other. But is that really love? Something worth staying together for? In the mind of an elderly (and most likely uneducated) couple, probably.

So that, in a nutshell is what I came away with from Junebug. It's a fairly real depiction of the cruelty that "love" can bring and how people try and live with it. It's depressing and I hate to think that people live this way, but they do. I don't understand it and it makes me sick. But I have no advice for these people. If this is your choice, then maybe you deserve to be miserable.

Now I need something like Amelie to cleanse my palette. Now that's romantic love... Or at least it is to me.

Which one is the 'any' key again?

Several observations and thoughts.

1. Twitter is far more useful/entertaining with an iPhone. I've tried a couple of apps and find TwitterFon to be the best of the free ones. The only bad thing is the browser for TwitterFon seems to crash or stall quite a bit. But now it's fun to read the stream of brain dumps on my iPod. On my computer? Not so much. Even with something like Twhirl or TweetDeck.
2. The iPhone needs push for third party applications already! This was promised in September but neither hide nor hair has been made of it as of late. What I really want is the AIM app to have a little badge telling me if someone's been chatting/texting me while I've had the app closed. You also need to be able to turn it off on an app-by-app basis. All I really need pushed is Mail and AIM. I don't especially need the App Store telling me when updates are available since I'm pretty anal about that already. (I get frustrated when I see that no new updates are available.)
   
3. The season premiere of Lost was incredible. It continues the trend of each season being an almost completely different kind of show. The only blemishes where the appearances of Bernard and Rose. Someone/something needs to kill those annoying motherfuckers. Maybe they'll time travel back to when some polar bears were still on the island and it'll eviscerate the whiny pricks. At least Claire is nowhere to be seen... Can't stand her either.
   
4. I wish there was some way to see when new episodes of my favorite shows where on. You know... other than watching TV/having TiVo? Apparently I've missed two episodes of the Office. Hulu to the rescue!
5. I've rented Valkyria Chronicles, but I'm not sure if I'm going to play it. I've had Star Wars: The Force Unleashed for several weeks and I still haven't played more than an hour of it. It's not because I don't want to, it's just that the only thing I've been using my 360/PS3 for is watching video. Which brings me to another point: Why do I necessarily have to sign-out of my account when watching video just so I don't have to see pop-ups telling me who is online or whatever? Why isn't there an option when viewing video to tell people that you're busy and to turn off notifications? Going and setting online availability to "appear offline" is a hassle too.
   
6. I desperately need a new computer -- and I don't mean just for gaming! Everyday tasks like watching video online or using Word or iTunes is slow as hell. That my tiny little iPod is probably more powerful than my computer is pretty pathetic. After I have my TV/PS3 paid off, a new PC will be my next big investment. Gotta have something to play Diablo III and StarCraft 2, right? I wonder if either of those will be out by the time Windows 7 comes out? I'm also hoping the prices on an Intel i7 system come down too. Who needs a 3 GB limit for RAM anyway?
   

More Wiis than people

I invite you to check out a web pilot for this show called The Remnants. From the Vimeo page:

The pilot for The Remnants, written and directed by John August. Starring Justine Bateman, Michael Cassidy, Ben Falcone, Ze Frank, Ernie Hudson, and Amanda Walsh.

It was shot during the WGA strike in February 2008, using the SAG internet agreement.

The project is currently in development with 60Frames in association with NBC/U, so it could in theory become a series at some point. Either way, we had a good time making it.

The Remnants from John August on Vimeo.

Who doesn't love the apocalypse? Whether it's from zombies, nuclear war, strange viruses, or robot uprisings, the apocalypse is a breeding ground for excellent entertainment. And yeah, I would like to see more of the Remnants. It reminds me of Shaun of the Dead (minus the zombies) ever so slightly and for some reason I have an aftertaste of The Guild going on as well. Neither of those fully encapsulates the flavor of Remnants, however. Perhaps Eureka or Invisible Friend? Ah, confound it. Just watch it already!

Fox Mulder wants to believe

Okay. Twitter has finally proven useful by reminding me that the season premiere of Lost is on tonight. You win this round, Twitter... I guess I'll watch Wheel of Fortune in HD in the interim. Both of my grandmothers would be proud. This may be the first time I've watched actual broadcast television in months. (Which is why I didn't know that Lost was on tonight.)

Actually... Screw the Wheel, grandma. The first episode of Area 5 has been uploaded to YouTube! Area 5 is the new show from the lovely people who where behind the 1UP Show. So Twitter has proven its mettle twice in one night. I don't foresee this as a trend, however.

Clown Baby bites back

If, like me, you sometimes grade games on the number of Cyndi Lauper remixes in their soundtrack, then this free game may just be for you. The Goonies 20th Anniversary Edition is a fan-made game for the 2006 Retro Remake competition (whose website is being camped at the moment). It's like the PlayChoice-10 version from my childhood that resided in a Mexican restaurant in my hometown. ('sup Taco Tico?) Thankfully, it doesn't include the confusing first-person corridors from the NES version of Goonies 2.

You know... That's one movie sequel I would like to see from my childhood. Make it with Sean Astin and his kids and get Spielberg and Richard Donner involved and it could be good. There have been rumors about this, but who knows...

I've also been re-enjoying It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. What a great show! I watched the episode entitled "Hundred Dollar Baby" last night and I couldn't stop laughing. Maybe I was just in a good mood, but I don't often laugh aloud that much. I also like the fact that it moves along at a good clip and I feel like I get more out of twenty-two minutes with it versus other shows with the same time constraints. While It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia isn't quite as shocking as I remember it (desensitized much?), I'm quite glad that FX is continuing to produce the show. I just wish Fox would have been that gracious with Arrested Development or ABC with Pushing Daisies...

I've got the Blu-ray version of Dexter season 1 in my Netflix queue, but I'm not so sure about it. If it wasn't for Michael C. Hall, I probably wouldn't bother at all. Frankly, other than Little Miss Sunshine (which is coming out on Blu-ray in February), I'm not too interested in anything in my queue at the moment. I went through a sort of Asian phase recently with Chungking Express, Oldboy, and the Last Emperor. I didn't like Chungking Express at all and the Last Emperor was okay (albeit very long), but I thought Oldboy was fantastic. To me, it has elements of Memento and Fight Club in it and I couldn't have been more pleasantly surprised by the film. Check it out if you haven't seen it.

I am considering watching Firefly again since it's now available on Blu-ray. I really love that show, but the factual accuracy of having no sound in space just irritates me! Somehow that just makes it seem fake. I'm also not sure if it's worth a look on Blu-ray since I don't remember it being a very visually appealing show... Still Nathan Fillion is awesome and so are cowboys in space.

Well, that's the brain dump for now. Hopefully February is a more exciting month than January.

Feeling chipper?

Well, at least 1UP still has the venerable Jeremy Parish whose Retro Gaming Blog is buried somewhere on that site. If (like me) you grew up with an NES, then his three-part series of posts on Hidenori Maezawa will be of interest to you. Maezawa worked at Konami in the 8-bit days and composed the excellent Castlevania III soundtrack. Check out this video on the differences between the American and Japanese soundtrack:

To hear the reasons why these games sounded so different, read the accompanying blog. I don't know about you, but it makes me want to compose some chip tunes.

Right now I am a little mad that there are two good games coming out in February that I want. I have to decide between getting Star Ocean: The Last Hope or Street Fighter IV for my birthday (with Chrono Trigger being a shoe-in). Space it out a little, please! Decisions like these are tough. Hopefully I can somehow manage both...

I did buy Crayon Physics Deluxe for the iPhone/iPod touch this morning (there has got to be a more concise way to say that). It features some nice, soothing music and some neat additions that have been made since the demo from a while ago. It is a bit choppy though. Some of my old tricks from the PC version don't work so well and now it seems a little more linear, but it's still very interesting. For $5, it's nice.

tiny pebbles

Isn't it funny that when I first heard of Hulu I thought that it was a stupid idea and now I think it's kinda cool? Watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Arrested Development, 30 Rock, and episodes of the Office that I may have missed? Yes, please. Now it just needs to come to the 360 like Netflix did.

I've found that I'm not really into Californication anymore. I enjoyed season one, but season two has kind of lost me. I can't stand the "We're together! We're not! We're together!" back and forth of the show. Hank Moody scores points with his "wife" and then he screws things up... Over and over again. I'm not really into the daughter either. Either of them. One is trying too hard to be Wednesday Adams (which is a common teenage phase I guess) and the other is a butterfaced evil succubus.

I found season two of Chuck to be better than season one though. It had a bit of a weak start and some back story episodes that just didn't work, but it also had some of the strongest episodes yet. Still not a great show, but I enjoy it. I've also watched a bit of Wonderfalls and I think it's alright. Pushing Daisies and the early episodes of Dead Like Me are much better though.

On the subject of music, today I made the decision that I don't need to have discs and discs of '80s music sitting around on my drive. I've done this kind of thing before with different music and artists, but today it was with these '80s compilations I had. If I have the urge to hear a song (say Spandau Ballet's "True" or R.E.M.'s "The One I Love" or Godley & Creme's "Cry"), I'll just YouTube it. It won't sound great, but it'll save me some hard drive space. Kinda silly since storage and RAM are fantastically cheap nowadays, but my system is quite limited. I'll upgrade after I've paid off my TV and when Diablo III comes out.

Still keeping with music, I've now re-discovered how much I like listening to music thanks to my iPod. Now, I listen to a lot of music, but since I abandoned my CD player years ago, it's been a while since I've just laid down, put a blanket over my head and just listened to music. That sort of sensory deprivation listening is my favorite. It's intimate and it's serene. The only problem is that the iPod's earphones are terrible -- not just sound quality-wise, but comfort-wise too. Apparently, my right ear canal is smaller than my left one and the earbud constantly falls out of my right ear while causing pain because I'm trying to keep it shoved in there. So now I'm trying to decide between Etymotics ER-6i or Ultimate Ears Super.fi 4 in-ear monitors for my birthday.

Albums I've found work quite well for when you're trying to get to sleep are the Shins' Oh, Inverted World and Sun Kil Moon's Ghosts of the Great Highway. Of course, Elliot Smith is fantastic too (Give "Between the Bars," "Miss Misery (Early Version)" and "Angel in the Snow" a listen). I've also re-examined the Arcade Fire's Neon Bible and have found that I enjoy it way more than I thought. I think Funeral is still their best album though. I'm also quite fond of this "bar music" that I've been hearing from Frank Turner. Makes me want to punch you, buy you a drink, and then reminisce about punching you, laughing all the while.

The story thus far

Jeff "Dad" Green has a few blog posts that summarize the 1UP/UGO situation.
January 6
January 7
January 11
The second one in particular really captured my feelings quite well.

It's not fair that EGM couldn't have published their final issue with Street Fighter IV on the cover. Instead we get a cover with an uninspired closeup of a CG Wolverine face... So sad. It would have been very appropriate to have a Street Fighter cover story be the last issue. EGM is often linked to Street Fighter because of the infamous April Fool's joke telling gamers how to play as Shen Long in Street Fighter II. And guess what? Shen Long (now called Gouken) is in Street Fighter IV! You can find a draft of the cover story online on 1UP along with an open letter from the producer of the game. The producer's letter even calls out EGM as partly responsible for bringing Street Fighter back. So in a sense, playing the game will be like giving tribute to EGM.

Dan "Shoe" Hsu and Crispin Boyer also wrote a farewell to EGM article on their Sore Thumbs blog that's worth reading. As for myself, I think the "Japan Issue" (September 2008) was one high point for the magazine. Someone had that balls to say in print that Japan was losing touch and the crew of EGM investigated the whys with several fantastic interviews with some big names in both Eastern and Western games. The cover may have been terrible (some slut from Soul Calibur IV), but the content was superb.

I'm still not stable after the whole situation. I feel like I've lost my home. The Rebel FM podcast debuted last week with the cast of the "kid's table" (as Shane Bettenhausen would say) and Talking Orange may soon be the new 1UP Show. So there's hope. Things can only get better, right?

Stop the silence!

Right now I'm wondering why this awful concept of tacking on minutes and minutes of silence to a song at the end of an album so you can insert a "hidden" track still exists. I hate fast forwarding 25 minutes and 30 seconds into mewithoutYou's "The Cure for Pain" just so I can hear a song that I love so much. At first it was amusing when I was a kid when I would listen to Green Day's Dookie so that I could hear that song about masturbation at the end of "F.O.D."

I was alone
I was all by myself
No one was looking...
I was thinking of you

It exists elsewhere. Rilo Kiley's Initial Friend EP. The Silversun Pickup's Pikul EP. Circa Survive's Juturna. Etc. Etc. It's a terrible idea. Stop it. It's dumb. Even with today's technology and being able to instantaneously zip around a song's time line, it's still a waste of time. So please; STOP IT!

In which our hero tries Twitter for a day and almost immediatley dismisses it

How to put this gently? I don't think Twitter is good for much except stalking California hipsters. There is some interesting stuff that is tweeted, but I think for the most part it's pretty dull. I personally can't see myself getting any use out of it unless I had more tech savvy friends. Even my best friend now isn't one to e-mail often. So unless you have friends or "friends" on Twitter (or if you like stalking said hipsters), I don't see what Twitter has to offer the common man.

It seems to be a tool used for the ego. All the time I hear on the Revision3 shows "Add me on Twitter!" or "Add so-and-so to Twitter!" Ego. There's really nothing to get out of it. I also fear that for myself personally, it would hinder my writing and my already inconsistent blogging habits. It would create an excuse for me to be even lazier. 140 characters isn't enough to get out a lot of my thoughts, brief as they may be. Also: Who cares? I wouldn't read my own Twitter account. I'm boring. I don't know anything.

Just my two cents. Must be a San Francisco thing.


Edit: I forgot to mention that no more than an hour after signing up for Twitter I already had two people following me who I had no idea who they where. One of those "super friend" psychos who's aim is to have as many "friends" as possible. Sad...

Headache

I've been having trouble lately with Google. About two months ago or so, I started forwarding all e-mail to one Gmail account. Or at least I thought I was. It forwarded to my old primary account just fine, but when it came to forwarding stuff to my new primary account, it just wasn't working. So I've missed several e-mails from my sister as well as missing messages from my phone carrier. After an hour of switching back and forth, I finally got it, but man what a terrible experience.

It's a pain not being able to be logged into both accounts at the same time. Logging in and out of one account to go double check something in another is frustrating. It also became doubly frustrating when Blogger decided to not like my new e-mail address. I was able to stay logged into Blogger with my old address and be logged into Gmail with my new address with no problems for the longest time. Now, when I sign into one service, it signs me into both services with that particular e-mail address. So I had to create another Blogger account, invite myself to my own blog, and then give myself admin privileges. It's infuriating! Why can't Google just let me change my login e-mail address? Sure you can change your e-mail address, but your login stays the same which is problematic when you use Gmail and other Google services.

I couldn't tell you how many e-mail addresses I've had over my lifetime. I'd say about six to eight personal ones and about two more for school. Most of those are irrelevant now, but when it comes to the two that actually matter... Ugh! I'm just so aggravated right now. If Google had taken my advice to give Gmail a tabbed interface with a tab for each account and one that consolidates all mail, then this wouldn't be a problem. So you've failed me twice over Google. Good job.

But seriously, other than this round of shenanigans, Google and Gmail have been really good to me. Most of it comes down to my own ignorance I suppose. Still, Google didn't exactly make it easy for me this time around.

On another note (and speaking of consolidating), I've decided to give FriendFeed a whirl. It'd probably be more useful to my friends if I did the Facebook and Twitter thing as well, but I think I'll decline from participating with those two services. Not very modern of me, I know.

My best regards

1UP has been acquired by UGO. Many talented staff members have been let go. EGM is gone. Podcasting and the 1UP Show is gone. This is terrible, terrible, terrible news. Podcasts where the best part of 1UP and UGO throws them away like so much refuse... For shame! That's what gave the site its identity and what endeared me to its wonderful staff in the first place. It gave further dimension and personality to its otherwise sublime content.

I hope all of the talented staff members who have been let go can find good work. I also hope that the remaining staff members are able to turn this around into something positive.

I'll wait for more details until I unleash my vitriol on UGO/Hearst. Until then, good luck everyone. All of you are awesome.

Hey, I don't wanna go to work today
Wanna stay home and play all my video games

No, I don't wanna take it nice and slow
Wanna get ready to go
On the 1UP show

On the 1UP show
You know you'll be a star
On the 1UP show
You already are
Everyday is like a holiday

So long, good bye
I'm gonna run away right now
Game on, all night
I'm gonna be on the 1UP show